Awesome Stuff

Ellen and I are doing a Pray 10 and I’m drawn to the question of why I haven’t blogged recently. Amazing stuff has been going on in my small group.
Eleven guys juggled life’s demands and spent all or part of a weekend together on retreat. Great food (and lots and lots of it), good wine, great weather, some fishing, some golf and more than our share of tears and brokenness. We shared our stories for 7 hours (a couple of our newer guys hadn’t heard all our stories) and I was drained, exhilarated, saddened, uplifted, exposed, challenged, and humbled at the end. What an amazing group of guys and how awesome is God’s presence when we are together.
We were using John Eldredge’s Walking With God DVD for the retreat. Two questions, among several, stuck with me. Do you believe God speaks to you directly? Not just in scripture, not just on Sunday, not just generally, but directly, to you, every day in your ordinary circumstance. And do you hear God speak to you? Not in formulaic prayers, in the exercise of weekly ritual, or in “thou shalt” or “thou shall not”, but in a way that directs and determines how you live your every day life. I’m still coming to grips with both those questions, but the questions clearly hit home in our group.
In our meeting the following week, we continued with the Eldredge DVD, and it challenged us to pray for one of our group members and listen for God speaking. I was very skeptical, almost put off by this exercise. Then I was asked to share something I struggled with and allow the group to listen to God and pray for me. What an amazing, powerful experience. And I heard God speak to my brokenness. Not a voice, not a blinding light, definitely hard to explain, but real.
Now I know what you’re thinking and I’m right there with you. That’s pretty crazy thinking. It’s a bit over the top. How much wine was I drinking? But if you listen to Eldredge, you might have to admit the possibility. If God created the universe, if God is in control of it all, if everything amazing comes from God, why couldn’t God choose to speak to me or anyone else directly and personally? And why wouldn’t God want to be that personal? Maybe the problem is that God is speaking to me and I’m just not listening or placing myself in a position to hear God’s voice.
And so why haven’t I been blogging? Eldredge has taught me to believe in the spiritual battle that exists with a very real, very personal Satan. Again, not an image, or a theory, or a concept, but a real, tenacious Evil Being that wants to bring me down and separate me from God. Jesus believed in the existence of this Evil Being. Jesus fought this Evil Being and his constant attacks. If Jesus knew Satan was real and active in His life, it’s not much of a reach to believe Satan is active in my life.
And so why haven’t I been blogging? Is it because Satan is actively working against any good that might come from my blogging? Have I bought into the lie that blogging about my group is a waste of time? Or that I don’t have anything of value to say? Are my efforts to develop a deeper, more personal communication with God coming under attack? Were our efforts at the retreat moving all of us closer to a loving relationship with Jesus and Satan hopes we forget about it and move on with our daily lives?
I believe that any time we try to reveal God’s glory in our life we will be assaulted. I believe that Satan wants nothing more than to quiet the voices of those struggling to deepen their relationship with Jesus. I believe listening to God means fighting all the distractions that Satan puts in our way every day.
I am blessed and strengthened by my band of brothers. God is truly at work in a special way when we are together. I pray that all of Nativity small groups experience this blessing and resist the temptation to be quiet about the awesome things God is doing in their lives.